Tuesday, July 5, 2011

I was not invited to the wedding

Years and years and years ago, one of my female cousins got married. She wanted a wedding that was more than she and/or her parents could afford and my father and another of her uncles paid for it. I must have been 9 or 10 years old, not really sure of my age, but a wedding - a young girl's dream of watching. But wait. I was not invited. Even though my father helped pay for it (or paid for almost all of it) "we're not having children at this wedding." So I spent the day with one of my considerably older cousins who also was not invited to the wedding. But he was a male, quite a grown man, and did not have any romantic visions of weddings.

I never heard a description of the wedding, of the wedding dress, of who was there, of what was served, or what kind of flowers decked the venue - nothing. My parents protected me against anything that might hurt me or my feelings. And the excuse of no children may or may not have been true. I never heard if there were any young people there or not.

Contrast this slight with my son's wedding to his beautiful, darling, intelligent, talented, and understanding wife. My two young grandchildren were both part of the wedding party. They did not detract from the beauty of the bride, they added to the beauty of the ceremony. They scattered the flower petals with the perfection of children. They walked slowly, smiling at the spectators, and running to their parents when they finished their jobs. Wonderful!

And now, there is another wedding, fortunately not from our side of any family, and the edict was "no children" and again, the girls were disappointed at first and the boys couldn't care. The wedding couple and their parents don't have the slightest idea of the joy they are missing, nor do they know what dark karma forces they have unleashed in this pique of nastiness.

I don't wish anybody any harm or unhappiness. But I think that as the years go by, there will be many, many, many regrets.

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