Thursday, February 3, 2011

"It pays to be ignorant"

Back in the glory days of radio, "It Pays to Be Ignorant" brought laughs, chuckles and outright guffaws to the listeners. The master of ceremonies asked a question, like "who is the Lincoln car named after?" and someone on the panel of comedians would say, "Mr. moderator, Mr. Moderator - 2-door or 4-door?"
We thought we were listening to reruns when we heard Andy Reid's press conference. He introduced Juan Castillo, and praised him as the great offensive line coach of this year's Philadelphia Eagles. This is the same offensive line that had Michael Vick running for his life when he wasn't suffering a concussion. This is the same offensive line that permitted Kevin Kolb to get concussed. In fairness, the Chicago quarterback, Cutler, received the most sacks in the league but Vick received the most hits.
It must have been in the air. While speaking to one of our neighbors, I said that I had to call AAA's twice to get our car off the ice and out of our driveway. She almost said, 2-door or 4-door. What she did say was, which way was your car facing? She is the same neighbor who did not notice any storms on Wednesday and could not imagine trees down and power outages. However, she did say that she read that the Super Bowl had been cancelled. I warned her not to say that to anyone else because she would be thought of as an idiot. "So what?" she asked. And then to compound her foolishness, she said that the Dallas airport is closed and no one can get in or out and they had to cancel the game because of weather.
Another time, while talking about different places, she brought up her extensive knowledge of the neighborhood by, totally inappropriately, remarking that "there used to be a victory garden there, during the war," and by proferring her vast knowledge that a woman who used to own a store was killed by a motor boat accident in Ventnor over the summer. I was waiting for the moderator to interrupt her.

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